1139: Dolly Would by Julie E. Bloemeke
1139: Dolly Would by Julie E. Bloemeke
Transcript
I’m Major Jackson and this is The Slowdown.
Prince. Whitney. Drake. Bey. Taylor. Icons! So familiar, we need only call them by their first names. How startling the time and accumulated effort that fashions a household celebrity — and not just the hours put in by these talented musicians, but also their teams and collaborators. To build an image and reputation from dreams requires herculean efforts that often involve doubts, failures, and sacrifices, but as we hear in today’s poem, a devotedness to one’s art that transforms a passion into a stratospheric journey into the self.
Dolly Would
by Julie E. Bloemeke
It’s too easy to Pigeon Forge Dolly into 9 to 5, DD twang, to not heed her Better Day concert advice: Darlin’, own your truth. Because Dolly became Dolly in a fallen chapel of deep woods Tennessee, strumming into the air, praising into the only tongue she knew, her congregation of God, song, and sex—naked graffiti lusting sanctuary over the walls: The sexuality, the spirituality, the sensuality, that’s exactly who I am, she tells Dolly Parton’s America, the joy of the truth I found there is with me to this day. I had found God and I found Dolly Parton and I loved them both. And don’t forget how they all tried to stop her, but even Daddy couldn’ta wooped the glitter outta her, as she snuck out back to press pokeberries to her lips, line her eyes with blackened match tips, or how she’d head over to town just to witness some somethin’ somethin’ strutting down the walk, goldfish swimming in those coveted acrylic heels, an invocation for this woman’s town trollope red nails, breasts booming forward, all a beyond compare to the eventual Jolene. And all the mothers saw this too, said, oh no, ducking their heads, checking that top button for good measure, already forming the trash words they would whisper later over fences. I admit it: I too used to see only wigs and corsets until I finally got it: only so much fake could be true. And tonight Dolly proves it, pulls in the lights all around her, invites us to pour into that same cup of ambition, all 5 foot something of her who yodels, fiddles, plays bluegrass, raps then can’t, belts gospel, all a capella in her little sparrow, louder than a thunderstorm, sending chills through 98 degrees of solid humidity, whooping us still under cowboy hats, all the faces painted just like hers smiling back from their derelict hearts into a song of every last thing unsaid. A woman married decades who writes heartbreak like she’s lost every last time, this country blood in all of her colors, shakes herself to fire in rhinestone fringe, opens the butterfly down in me, holds the mic to the voice I never allowed, says, own your trash, says make a joyful noise, says I’ve always been, says, Jesus. And I want to tell her how my shut mouth was my loaded gun, my quiet khaki was a way to hide; I was taught never to be noticed, learned that my peace kept my father’s hands from raising, my mother’s voice from breaking, that the good girl took almost 40 years to realize she wasn’t, and good wasn’t best besides. I am not my own island in this stream, but now together you and I, Dolly, we sparkle and quake, we are holding everything, walking down that same city street, the higher the hair the closer to God, singing mighty after mighty fractured song, stomping our glitz & sex & Jesus, praising with every last step, and here we come again. God. And there I go.
“Dolly Would” by Julie E. Bloemeke from LET ME SAY THIS: A DOLLY PARTON POETRY ANTHOLOGY © 2023 Julie E. Bloemeke. Used by permission of Madville Publishing.